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Bonjour vous pouvez m'aider svp merci . Améliorer ma rédaction d'anglais pour qu'elle soit plus longue et plus précise merci .

Sujet : écrire une histoire sur un garçon ou une fille qui a décidé de rester jeune à jamais et possède des pouvoir magique


I’m Julia and I’m fifteen. Since I was a little girl, I always wanted to have magical powers and stay young for eternity. So one day, I was going to bed when a thunderstorm broke out which, with the wind, opened my window. A little fairy came in and took me away, flying. We landed in a clearing where there was a large stone wall with a hudge door. The fairy opened that door and pushed me through. I went to the other side, I fell and I passed out. I woke up on a beach, facing the ocean. I was in another world: a world where your world was under 18, a world where everyone had powers and trained all the time. It was then that I discovered that I had too. It was my new world.

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ROSEMEYGO

Réponse :

I'm Julia, I am a fifteen year old girl. Ever since I was a little kid, I couldn't stop wanting to have superpowers and most of all, stay young forever.One dark night, as I was in my bed waiting for my dreams to come up, a thunderstorm burst outdside my house. A gust of wind opened my window. I was so frightened. Slowly the wind stopped and a tiny fairy came up to me and made me fly away as she was holding my hand. When I realised what had just happened I saw myself in a small room, all made of stone and a ginormous door. I didn't know where she was, the fairy. But then I felt tiny hands pushing me through the door. I couldn't bear the troma and I passed out. I woke up on a beach facing the ocean. It was breath taking. It was like being in another world: a world where you shouldn't bother being a grown up, a world where everyone was under 18, the world I wanted all this time. It was my own world.

Voila, j'espere que ca te plait

NOELLE1040GO

Réponse :

Hi, my name is Julia, and I am fifteen years old, I live in the USA and I go to a public school, my life is pretty different from all the others, I have a big secret. It all started when I was younger, like many other little girls I wanted magic powers, but my wish was a little different. I wanted to stay younger for all eternity. But I never knew that that wish would come true. One night, while I was going to bed, a huge storm started and I was scared, so I hid under my warm blanket and tried to fall asleep, the wind was so strong that it blew my window open. A few seconds later I saw a small human shape come towards me, it looked like a fairy in all the Disney movies I had watched. The fairy carried me, which was confusing since she was about 10 times smaller than me. She took me away in front of a strange-looking door that looked like a mirror but at the same time a door, I thought I was dreaming. The mysterious fairy pushed me through the door and I fell into an endless hole, but instead of hitting the bottom, I passed out. I remember waking up, facing the beach. I had no idea where I was so I asked a little girl who was fishing and she said: "You are in the world of Pally, no one gets older than 18, it is where everyone has powers" I shouted with joy! My wish had been granted! I and so thankful that I live in this world, it is awesome. Maybe you should visit it someday.

Voila, j'espere que sa vous aides

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